One of the greatest limitations of my early work with Decomposing The Shadow was my hyper-focus on Self.

This was an important part of my own journey at the time and, of course, self-work is deeply important in the process of becoming a more mature human. However, Self is not an isolated, floating raft adrift a sea of experiences periodically knocking into other rafts. It is an intricately woven tapestry whose form is made and held by the threads between us. We are relational creatures and our relationships are deeply important factors to consider when we wonder about how psychedelics can better our lives.

How and why we are who we are and the way we see and engage the world is inseparable from the relationships of our past. And it is through our relationships in the present that we can better see ourselves and all the factors that give rise to our feelings, thoughts, and behaviors, both past and present. “The eye cannot see itself”.

The relevance of this relational investigation is a profound one for myself as I truly did not see any deeply mature actualizing of my psychedelic learning until I began to bring it into my relational world; both in taking the often painful look at myself and my behavior in the past and all that informed it, as well as integrating (read: learning) the lessons of those trips by bringing it into the way I show up to my current relationships.

Of course, none of this was easy for me and it is far from complete (in case that wasn’t clear). But something that has made it easier is building a greater informedness on early life wounding and on attachment theory.

In the lecture embedded below, I effort to blend my understandings of the psilocybin experience with the impact early life has on the way we are in relationship and what the potential of a psilocybin encounter might be for the ongoing health of our relational lives.

Topics Discussed

  • The curiosities about psychedelics that guide my work.
  • The neurobiological action of psilocybin
  • Dissolving the distinction between self and other
  • connecting with a timeless divine
  • What holds us back from connecting
  • Predictive modeling and the nature of reality
  • Early life Trauma/wounding/heartbreak
  • Attachment theory (secure, avoidant, anxious-ambivalent)
  • Weaponized love
  • The fundamentally coercive and traumatic nature of modern society
  • Tight models and cultivating response flexibility
  • Primal panic in the face of a loss of love
  • Psilocybin’s capacities to help us feel, express, resolve and reconsolidate early life trauma models
  • COEX systems and cumulative emotional charge
  • Psilocybin and emotive-psychosynthesis
  • The difference between lessons and learning
  • How a psilocybin experience can reorient your prioress in the world towards a greater focus on the quality of our relationships

Watch This Lecture

A download of the full lecture plus Q&A is available to my $8+ patrons. If you are a patron, click here for access. If you are not yet a patron, you can become one here. (psst… thanks for doing so!)

~~ Discuss this lecture in the subreddit! ~~

~{ The talk was recorded on August 21, 2019, in Covent Garden, London, England at the House Of Togetherness.
It was a pre-event for their annual summer festival, called Togetherness (which was a wonderful experience). You can learn more about Togetherness and the various events that they run via}~

Want to check out more lectures from me?

Here is my online archive, although you can also catch me on tour from time to time. Check out upcoming events here.

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